Keira Knightly is illegitimate offspring of Rachel Hunter and Robin Leach

My sister Dre read my About This Blog section and immediately accused me of being mean to poor Keira. More importantly, Dre went on to mention that most blogs contain more than one entry. Who made up that rule? But fine, if I must write something else, I shall clarify my feelings about Keira - this generation’s answer to Winona Ryder - with possibly less talent.

Winona basically approached every role in the same, non-committal fashion; making every one of her characters, from Lydia in Beetlejuice to Veronica in Heathers to Lady Anne in Looking for Richard (ahh Winona & Shakespeare), appear exasperated and altogether deflated. It’s as if she found her niche in Lucas and decided every other performance would be a variation on that whiny “give it to Luuuucas” pout/cry theme she developed back then. Even in her best performances (though I’m just not sure I am capable of picking one), she always seemed as if it were exhausting to merely have to utter dialogue.

Having said all that, I have always been of the belief system that if you're going to be in the movies you should be either talented or good-looking. (Then again Josh Hartnet and Bill Paxton continue to defy that logic.) But at least Winona has been vaguely pretty on more than one occasion. But Keira?? What’s this wonky-eyed, bad-postured, boy-boobied chick have to offer other than unimaginative, unbelievable portrayals and one of the single-most annoying voices in cinematic history? There can be no doubt she inherited that insipid twang from her long-lost parents, Rachel (“working out with weights”) Hunter and Robin (“and I don’t know why”) Leach. I’m definitely showing my age but there was a time in the 80s where it seemed that the pair of them were always on TV. Try as I might, however, I couldn’t find any really good classic audio clips of them – her Sports Illustrated Body Sculpting vid and any of his old Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous to give you a good idea. Nevertheless there are some hints of the past in the following clips and after you watch them, you can be the: Knightley – Hunter/Leach spawn?
Hunter
Leach
Knightley